10 Tips to fix your Attitude and achieve your Goals

Before you start reading I have to warn you, this week’s blog started out as random thoughts, but in your best interest and to give it some structure I’ve added some principles to it which you will find helpful in achieving your goals and fixing that attitude.

It all started with a quote:

First of all, let me save you a Google search and clarify the difference between attitude and behavior. Attitude shows how people think, feel and tend to behave towards people and/or things. Behavior is an activity or an action done. It occurs after the attitude. For example, Mr. A has a negative attitude about union leaders. Hence, he declined a job offered by an organization which is highly unionized (Behavior).

So now that we have clarified the technical bit let’s move on to the more interesting part. So judging by the explanation above, our attitude serves as the mental filter through which we see the world. It is your window to the world. Remember the famous example of glass being half empty or half full? That’s all about attitude.

And the reason I say attitude is everything is because:

1. Attitude determines the quality of your life

2. By changing your attitude from negative to positive, you can transform your life.

Most of my talks focus on this. I get both sad and angry when I see people with a defeated attitude towards life/things. Also, in most of my interactions with people, I see a big attitude-intention-behavior gap meaning most of the time there is so must disparity between their attitudes and behavior or between their words and actions.

We all start life with a good positive attitude. Small children are the best example. They have a great attitude towards everything: curious, inquisitive, explorers. In fact if you want to just stop reading at this point I will give you the main take away: Be like a Child: Curious, Fearless and Don’t Quit

So on that note without further ado, I will list down a few principles on how to achieve your goals by fixing your attitude:

1. Your dominant thoughts rule the day

There’s a power within each one of us that pushes us in the direction of our dominant thoughts.

2. Picture your success

Walt Disney said “If you can dream it, you can do it.” Develop and control the thoughts that occupy your head. And use the incredible power of your mind to picture your way to success. Instead of focusing on who you are not or what you don’t have, focus on who you really are and what you have.

3. Make a commitment

Often times, we make our goals in our heads. But according to a study on goal setting (which I can do a completely different blog post on), people who write down their goals are more likely to achieve it than those who don’t. So I would encourage you to always write down your goals and make a commitment to yourself or someone else who can hold you accountable, that you give it your best in order to fulfill them. Also commitments help overcome temporary defeats so you won’t give up easy,

4. Problems are Opportunities

Most of the times when we are confronted with problems, our first response is, why me? Why does it always happen to me? When in fact every problem is a learning opportunity that teaches us something valuable and those life lessons are some of the most valuable things in our lives.

5. You become your words

So choose your words wisely. Your words have incredible power! They are a product of your thought, they reinforce your beliefs, and your beliefs create your reality. So choose words that point you in the direction of your goals.

6. Quit Complaining.

Let’s just say that our troubles are like babies and the more you nurse them by complaining about them the larger they seem to grow. Complaining is counter-productive because by itself it accomplishes nothing and instead diverts us from taking any constructive action to improve the situation.

7. How are you?

Warning. I have a lot to say here. How do you respond when someone asks you how are you? Most of the time the auto reply is:” I’m fine or OK”. First of all, most of the time we don’t mean it. We just blurt it out spontaneously like a reflex action even if everything is wrong in our life at that point. Secondly the problem with I’m fine is that when you tell others and yourself that you’re fine, you don’t have to do anything about it! On the opposite end of the spectrum when you say “I’m horrible or bad” your negative words generate negative thoughts, that lead to negative feelings that can cause negative results……(somebody stop me!!)

8. Confront your fears

Like they say: dar kay agay jeet hai. If you do the thing that you fear than the death of fear if imminent (unless you have a phobia, then obviously you need therapy) and surely you have read and heard this a million times but think of it as a price that you have to pay for achieving your goals. You must be willing to get uncomfortable and do the things that scare you. Try the smaller fears first. Baby steps at a time

9. Fail! Fail! Fail!

Failure is essential to growth and in fact is one of the biggest fear that stands in your way of achieving your goals. Unfortunately, we consider failures something to be ashamed of when actually they are learning experiences that indicate to us any changes we need to make in our approach.

10. Keep Positive Company & Network

People who you spend the most amount of time with will have a significant impact on your mind, thoughts, personality and your vision. Sometimes you are even defined by the company you keep. Therefore, it’s crucial that you are carefully evaluate your social circle from time to time. Even though your journey to success starts from within there comes a point when you need relationships and associations to build upon it. Experts say that the most connected people are often the most successful.

In the end, the idea is simple. You can get everything you want by fixing your attitude. As long as you are clear about what you want, any attitudinal changes are just an indication of your willingness to go the distance for your goals. Once you are done reading the blog, you can put together a list of your own based on things you need to do or change in order to accomplish some goals or tasks that you have not been able to for some time and see if the principles really prove effective for you. Is your problem related more to your mindset? (That’s a whole other future blog).

*These success principles are inspired from Jeff Keller to give you a framework.